on pins and needles...

     I realized, after staring at the title of my blog for the last hour or so, that if I'm going to do this right, I've got to be honest. No holding back, or not 'putting myself out there', as they say. If I've submitted something, I'm going to post that I've submitted it, even if it means drying my tears with a computer keyboard when I have to post that a story got rejected. Mainly though, I'm just cocky enough to believe (as most writer's have to be) that I WILL be published, someday. Its just a matter of time. So that's what we're really recording here: how LONG this is actually going to take.

     So, this is where we're at. Back in August, I wrote a short story called DreamKiller, which no one but my family, and a certain red-head laid eyes on. I wrote it in a day and edited it the next, knowing I needed to push it out the door and submit it ASAP. (i.e. before I changed my mind.) So I sat down with the laptop and a glass of wine and, after booting up the first and chugging the second, I sent it off into cyber space with high hopes. Over the next four to six weeks, the rejection letters trickled in. The thing you need to understand, though, is how truly excited I was over each and every one of those rejections. You'd think they'd accepted it, from the look on my face. Because all I cared about, was that a real live honest-to-goodness editor, somewhere in the world- had read my work. That was exciting enough for me. I saved every single one of those emails!

     Now, it's time to get serious. I went back to it, and cleaned it up some more. (I have a nasty habit of repeating the same word multiple times throughout a paragraph) and I feel much more "ready" with it now. So, again I've done my research, and - wine free - sent it out to magazines for submission.

     I received my first rejection today, though it was and it wasn't. They told me that, unfortunately, my story would not be accepted for their winter 2010 issue, but they would be considering it for their spring 2011 issue. So its a rejection and a maybe, all in one? Just enough to get your hopes up, I guess. Just reading the email felt like a roller coaster, I get so nerve-wracked over seeing them in my inbox.

     Whew. That felt good. Now you know. And it's true, most people don't tell you about a dream, because they think it won't come true. So I'm telling you mine as my way of giving that pessimistic attitude the finger! And when I get my acceptance letter, you'll be the first to know. =)